.... But with every dark cloud comes a silver lining. Tim and I are getting Divorced... Sad, but necessary. He thinks it isn't hard on me, but he is very wrong. I feel lost most of the time, very alone... But I have met a wonderful woman, and we have become an item. I know that this is unorthodox, and some people will probably be rather upset with me over it, but what these people must understand is that she makes me happy in a way I haven't been in quite some time. I regret deeply the loss of what Tim and I had, but there is the key word in all of this... Had. In many ways, he was the other part of me that I felt I had been missing, but he was either unwilling or unable to meet me halfway, and in a marriage, everything should be a partnership. I watched what happens when a marriage is not a partnership when I was growing up, and I will be damned if I am going to put my kids through what I went through.... The fighting, the deceit, the philandering... I will not do that to them.
Tim will never understand why I couldn't take it anymore, but I know that if I were to have continued in the path I was on, I would have been spent in a matter of months. And nothing I could have done would have set things right. So I took the only path I could to remain vital and alive. I will always care for him, and about him, and I hope he knows this, I just cannot be anything more than his friend. I hope that he focuses on the good times and not the bad. And I hope, for his sake, he continues on the path he's been following, getting himself straight. I will always love him, and nothing will change that, but that is where it must stop. I hope he gets a chance to read this. It may give him some insight.
As always, Daddy. I love you, and I hope your day is going well.
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